Yes, it's happened again... I'm starting to think I might be cursed or something... Or am I just incredibly un/lucky?
Today I went wall climbing with my good friend Kanegon, as we've taken to doing every few weeks or so. Things were going well, I managed to climb a level 3 wall, quite a feat if I do say so myself, it was bloody hard but with some advice from the instructors I managed it. It's interesting, at first I thought it was about raw muscle strength, it partially is, but mostly it's about making the best use of energy that you already have, because in most cases, you already have the strength you need but it's about applying that strength effectively through balance and effective use of space. It's elementary physics in many respects too, which I do actually have a mild interest in despite my shunning of it post GCSE.
Anyway, I had moved onto this really great challenging new wall and I had got about half way up (maybe about 4 metres up or so, we routinely drop from heights of about 8 metres at the top, as there's loads of padding so it's fine as long as you land right.) I noticed kanegon was climbing up on my left side about as high as I had. The poor bloke was clearly struggling a bit, scrabbling at a fingerhold that was just a little bit to difficult to reach... Seconds later he gave me this look and I thought "yep, that's you gone" And sure enough a few seconds later he fell down. I thought not much of this to start with, especially as both of us and practically everyone else in the hall falls off relatively regularly.
A few minutes later I reached the top and dropped down myself, I noticed kanegon stretching his feet out, he looked a little uncomfortable so I sat down next to him and uttered a cheerful "だいじょうぶ " or "Daijobu" Which literally just means "are you alright?" Naturally being Japanese he told me he was just fine.
But he wasn't, two minutes later he was still grimacing stretching his legs and muttering "いたい itai!" (meaning "owch" basically). I asked him if he wanted me to get him some ice. In the end it turned out he needed a bit more than that. I gestured to the owner that I needed a bit of help, and he took the poor guy off to one of the back rooms, to look closer. At his point I just carried on climbing assuming he would be ok.
When he came back on crutches and with his foot taped up I decided something was definately not right. The owner recommended we dropped by a clinic "sometime" to have it looked at. Kanegon was looking a bit pale... and that horrible feeling started creeping back like last time. Now having worked in a hospital for a 3 months I'm no clinical expert. But when someone is quite unwell and in need of medical attention there's a "look" they have, and Kanegon had it right now. Drawing on my experience from last time, I gave Dr Takahama a call. His advice after hearing the situation was get to the nearest hospital, and quickly.
Of course here presented a problem. Kanegon could not put pressure on his foot. But he couldn't afford to call the ambulance. No one else at the centre could give him a lift. He turned to me and said... "can you drive me?" Now I really, really, really, wanted to say yes. The guy was really suffering. I don't have an international license or international driving insurance, I only passed my UK test back in June anyway... I've never driven anywhere in Japan except car parks and fieldsOutside it was dark, absolutely bucketing with rain and rush hour. . So I figured that balancing the risks, as much as he was suffering, he would be suffering a lot more if I took him through the front of his windscreen while trying to navigate one of Japan's deadly intersections. (Thank you very much A-Level Critical Thinking, I took away much more than just that D grade)
I told him this and thus followed the most agonising drive I've ever been in. Everytime the car had to brake Kanegon's face would contort into this awful scrunched up mess. I did my best to help by carrying everything, phoning all our contacts and his friends explaining the situation and of course navigating in the car, as neither of us had any idea at all where the bloody hospital was. As we were in Anjo City which I do not know at all. I told him to just focus on moving the car and I would watch traffic and naviagate. So at times there would be a lot of "stop!" "go!" "stop STOP!" etc etc. It would have been funny if it wasn't so horrible. Eventually we got to the hospital, and it kinda felt like a scene from a war movie. He was hobbling along though the absolute pouring rain with his arms around my shoulder, and me doing my best to support him. We entered the Hospital. God knows what they were thinking. But it's not everyday that one very wet Japanese in climbing clothes ,with his foot in a makeshift bandage-splint, and a very wet bedraggled and stressed foreigner stagger into the perfectly clean and uniform reception of a Japanese hospital and ask quite calmly if we can see a doctor. We got some looks, that's for sure.
In the end in turned out he'd broken one of the central bones in his foot, and it would take around two months to recover. It was kind of weird being sat in another hospital and ANOTHER X-ray room on my day off but whatever. The most important thing was that the guy had some help in getting to the hospital and someone to keep him company while he waited for the doctors to sort him out. Which did take ages. It's not all bad, in a way the guy's got the best Christmas present he could hope for. Two months off work!!!
On top of that other interesting things happened this week. I went to Dr Takahama's "party" but to my horror it turned out to be more of the Japanese equivelent of the W.I. Christmas party. Now it's pretty intense to walk into a very formal setting in England, knowing you have to watch your every move and word extremely carefully to set a good impression. Imagine it in Japan when the first thing is said to you is "I hope you speak Japanese, the other foreigner doesn't" No pressure. So I brought out my politest Japanese for all.
Of course these kind of people are quite easy to handle if you play up to their values. So I just mentioned my education credentials, goals and ambitions etc, pretty soon they softened considerably and even became somewhat friendly by the end. Crunch time came towards the end, when we were asked to make a speech in Japanese. Whoops.
But despite this it wasn't too bad, I had the advantage of someone going before me so I was able to see exactly what not to do or say. So, I just made a short 3 minute natter about what I do here, and how much I enjoyed it, and even managed to drop the hint that I was looking for potential more vounteer work in the future. What could have been a very embarassing social faux pas, ended up as an excellent opportunity to rub shoulders with some important people in the local community and get my name out. Most of the women there were either local franchise owners, or in the medical industry, such as running other clinics or small hospitals nearby. Iwas approached by a few towards the end, including such flattering remarks as "for someone who's been in Japan 3 months, your Japanese is excellent" (That's really not true, it could be so much better, if I could find the time and motivation to study PROPERLY) and "I run a maternity clinic, there are many midwives there, we could use a balance, you're a very charming man, I'm sure you could fit in" I just told people if they need to contact me they can do it through Nakazawa clinic. I doubt anything will come of it, but it's good practice regardless for the future.
So from medical emergencies to "high" society, what next for the ginger in Japan? Well, a week long pissup in Tokyo actually. I'm sorry if you were expecting something else noble and enthralling. I'm really looking forward to meeting my great Canadian friend Craig once again, it should be amazing fun bombing around the largest metropolitan area in the world, on the busiest holiday in the world.
The weirdest thing about all this, is I'm building all these contacts connections and friends just to lose them all in exactly two months and ten days. Things are progressing excellently but I feel a bit like government on it's last term, which is about to lose the election. You can change everything, but will it make any difference? Will you even be remembered after you leave? After that time I will be adapting something of a nomadic life, homestaying, travelling, travelling with family, backpacking, touring etc.
My only regret so far in this whole endeavour is that I clung to what was familiar for perhaps a little too long. If I ever return as a JET or something, time will no longer be an issue, and I can go as mentally ballistic as I like. The other thing about these last few months is I think I've finally found what kind of person I really am and what I can do, and what I want to do with my life. I'm never going to be able to live the same way again. I listen to the radio in the UK sometimes, and it's still really great to listen to, but many of the things that interested me before have just lost all appeal to me. I don't know... can I ever settle down to a nine to five and office job? The world's out there with so many opporunities and people. I met many people here, who aren't even 25 who are saying things like... Oh I can never go travelling now, I'm too old. I can't stop what I do now, that's just what I do, all I really want to do is settle down. Well it's a trap...if you want to do it... get out now, or you'll find yourself just like one of the poor old people in the secure unit one day, all their lives wanting to do something, but always letting more "important" things take their place. Isn't your innermost desire and dream something that's worth giving up everything you know for? Isn't "normal" life boring? So many people complain about hating their lives. Do something about it.
That being said, I would be lying if I said I don't yearn for the stability of home sometimes. And I am looking forward to starting my degree next year. Honest.
Saturday, 22 December 2007
Saturday, 15 December 2007
Thank you!!!
I have been really surprised by the popularity of this blog, I just checked the number of visitors and views.... It's over 1000! The youtube channel has had the videos viewed 800 times, and had 250+ unique visitors.
I'm really surprised and somewhat flattered that so many people have shown an interest in what I originally thought would only be a small site viewed by a few family and friends. It's the readers that make this site after all, so thank you very much!
Of course I can now continue to shamelessly plug my youtube channel, please go and take a look http://www.youtube.com/dryan5 If you haven't already
I'm really surprised and somewhat flattered that so many people have shown an interest in what I originally thought would only be a small site viewed by a few family and friends. It's the readers that make this site after all, so thank you very much!
Of course I can now continue to shamelessly plug my youtube channel, please go and take a look http://www.youtube.com/dryan5 If you haven't already
Ride on Japanese Trains
This is a video I put together about a month ago, showing all that's going on with the Japanese train system
Saturday, 8 December 2007
Catch up post!
Well I'm really sorry if I worried anyone through my lack of communication, it's just I have been so incredibly busy I just haven't had the time to write anything half decent, I also had a period of personal life difficulty which was taking up a lot of my thoughts and time. I did write a really long entry in the middle of November (about 5000 words) But then I messed it up when I was trying to copy some pictures in it and lost it all. I was so disheartened it took me a few weeks to get the balls to write another one.
Things have changed a lot in the last few weeks, Including me physically, kind of by accident actually. I've taken to working out now more regularly, and have gone wall climbing with a Japanese friend of mine a few times. I'm trying to find the motivation to push ups in the morning too but so far not quite managed it. On top of that, instead of negotiating my way through a Japanese barber shop, a colleague at work offered to cut my hair for me, it was free so I wasn't going to complain. Unfortunately it was difficult to communicate the kind of look I wanted to achieve, so my new hair cut is a kind of weird hybrid of my former haircut and a kind of pseudo Japanese haircut look. To be honest after the placement I think I'm just going to say to hell with it, while travelling, and just let it grow, grow, grow. Same with shaving too, I'm not sure it's worth paying for razors and stuff when I'm travelling, so I'll probably just let it go a bit wild, and have something of caveman look to frighten everyone with when I return to the UK. It's not like I'm going to have to look reasonably respectable for an employer like I do at the moment anyway.
Other interesting things coming up in the next few weeks, I'm at the moment putting plans together to travel to Tokyo for New Year. This will be absolutely amazing if it all pays off. There are 3 main reasons I want to go. First off, New Year Party in the capital of Japan... what more can you ask for?! I'm hoping to be at Tokyo Tower new year street party with 10,000 other people to watch the release of a million balloons at midnight on Dec. 31st. Second January 1st is the day almost all Japanese travel to shrines all over the country to pray for good luck for the year ahead. It's an incredible atmosphere at shrines on Jan 1st, and particularly at the Meiji Shrine in Tokyo where over 1 MILLION people will pass through the shrine in one day to pay their respects. I hope to be among them. Thirdly on January 3rd Emperor Akihito will be became a public appearance at the Imperial Palace in Tokyo. This is a very big deal. The emperor is simply not accessible to the general public at all. The Imperial Family is nothing like the British Royal Family, The emperor only makes about two public appearance a year, once on his birthday, and once on January the 3rd. Other members of the royal family are even less frequently seen. No one really knows what goes on in the Imperial Household, and Japanese get uncomfortable when talking about the emperor, even today. I have noticed this the few times it has come up in conversation. It's also one of the very few times when the general public are allowed inside the Imperial Palace grounds. It's also a highly unusual event as there is very rarely any public outpouring of emotion in this country. In my opinion an unmissable opportunity. On top of all the cultural opportunities, I'm planning on travelling to Tokyo with my good Canadian friend and fellow gapper Craig, who is currently working at the Osaka district hospital. I'm also planning on travelling with Thunusha, an American English teacher I met here in Nishio City. The three of us, plus Thunusha's boyfriend, should have one hell of a week. Even better Thunusha's good friends with some semi-famous band from the US, who are in Tokyo at the moment, so we've been guaranteed some places to stay and some interesting events to go to. But as always I've got a good selection of back up plans, because some things are bound to go titsup, that's just one of the laws of travelling. I might even get a chance to return to Akihabra which would be excellent, because I didn't really get a feel for it last time unfortunately. I remember it fondly because it was one of my first experiences of Japan.
Other things that have changed in the last few weeks, I've found that I've diverged quite significantly from my gap partners out here. I rarely socialise with them now, except through work. It's unfortunate, but we've just found that there is less and less that we agree on in so many areas. Things have unfortunately degenerated into arguments a few times. Cooperation between the three of us is not essential, but it's a definite plus. There are many points of conflict, I think the attitude they take to our employers is at times a bit insulting, given our employers generosity, some of the things they get up to I consider a bit risky, considering our situation. I'm all up for having fun, in fact I will do some of the most ridiculously stupid things at times (let's just say News Streaking is on my to do list ) but being here is not like at home, and so we have to make some exceptions. I think I will go into details into some of the difficulties we face post-placement, it's not in my interest to stir up feelings now. But as a note to anyone considering gap years, make sure you can work with the people your given, and if you can't. make sure you can deal with that too! I'm not the only one who's been in difficulty either, a few of the other gappers in other parts of the country have expressed frustration at some of the attitudes of their partners. But we knew when we signed up that we would likely be paired with complete strangers and asked to cooperate for several months. It was in black and white and we knew it was coming, so for me I will just see this a test and lesson in dealing with people with completely different attitudes to you. Perhaps if I handled this better there would have not been a degeneration into arguments at times, but that should just be considered a lesson well learnt.
Cooperation and working with people is especially important here. At home is you find you don't get along with someone, you just withdraw from their company, and move onto someone else. Out here, there is no such luxury. In three months I can remember every single time I have seen someone who was not Japanese in Nishio City, that's how homogeneous this society is. If you don't get on with someone, you can withdraw from their company but that leaves you in a very difficult situation. You can't just pop into the local pub and strike up a conversation with a stranger, because it just does not work like that here. Socialising in Japan is like an ever-increasing spiral. You meet a person, who will introduce you to their friends, and if their friends like you, then they will introduce you to their friends.... etc etc. So, as a foreigner with no natural contacts you can find yourself almost completely isolated, a few fellow foreigners here in Nishio have been expressing their feelings of loneliness that they have been experiencing, it's especially bad if you do not get on well with your employer, as many many many social connections are made through work, and it's one of the few places where the "don't socialise with strangers" rules does not apply... Now all of these feeling of loneliness are amplified by a million by the language barrier too. However if you are lucky/hardworking enough to be fluent this country is your playground. You have to enterprising, motivated and a bit brave to break into Japanese social circles as a foreigner with limited Japanese but it can be done.
Despite this however most Japanese are curious, but shy of foreigners. Everyday you will see people steal glances at you, and you know that they would love to ask you questions but never will. I would say some of my best friends here are Japanese. Some Japanese (especially those learning English) will be very pleased to meet you, and will seemingly lap up every word you say (You're British? How cute! You're a University Student? How amazing!) Many will ask to have a photo taken with you, which I feel kind of weird about because it's like being claimed as a trophy, to show off to friends, but whatever. Given my personality (an attention hog at the best of times, unfortunately) it's great fun at parties when you get a lot of attention from people (especially girls)
And don't even let me get started on Japanese women. In my opinion physically they are stunningly beautiful and so cute. But of course everyone knows that relationships with people need to be built on more than looks. Many Japanese girls would be very interested in having a foreign boyfriend, sometimes for the wrong reasons as it carries a certain Kudos in some sectors. Often foreigners are considered exotic looking and beautiful. Some girls will (very cutely) go all giggly when you talk to them, some will get very touchy feely, some will be flat out uninterested. And some are "Eigo Bandits" This is a nickname for a girl who may be very flirty with you, and give signs that she's interested in a relationship, like taking you out on dates. But is really only interested in learning your English ("Eigo" is the Japanese word for English). Now I have a few female friends here in Japan who I do only meet to practice English (and Japanese) with. Such as the girls in my English Class. As long as both parties understand that, there's not much scope for things to go wrong.
Getting involved with Japanese romantically is a potentially thorny area. It's aggravated by differences in expectation in culture. Here it's considered normal to be married off by 25, and making babies by the late twenties. In fact it's not just normal, it's the expectation. Marriage is not like marriage at home, in which the predominant motivator seems to be love. Here love is a strong factor, but financial compatibility, working preferences all play a much stronger role than at home. In a way marriage can be better understood by thinking of it as a partnership pact in which both parties will benefit massively from in their work lives. I sadly see a reflection of this in some of the children at the nursery, the youngest group contains babies that are maybe 9-10 months old. Yes that's right, 10 month year old babies that are taken to a nursery EVERY DAY five days a week. That's just the way it is, Japanese people don't love their families any less than western families it's just the work ethic is incredible. Most of my Japanese colleagues start work a the same time as me but finish much later. Public affection is also a big no no. I can't remember the last time I saw a couple embracing in public. Even couples rarely hold hands. In a way it's refreshing, because there's nothing worse than being single and seeing loads of happy couples together eating each others faces off. (hmm) But I think if I was in a relationship here, it would be hard to switch off my emotional desires and needs everytime we where in public. As a foreigner your stay in Japan is very often going to be temporary. Casual relationships are less common here, but they do occur. Your temporary status is often a big off putter for Japanese girls.
Japan is a country that is either going to shoot to new heights in the new century, or fall spectacularly behind, like the United Kingdom in the middle of the 2oth Century. The primary problem with Japan's development is rigid conservatism in it's political and business machinery. The Prime Minister is almost always over 70, firms rarely recruit from outside organisations, god forbid outside countries. Sony only recently appointed it's first foreign CEO, while groups in the West have been doing it for years (Arun Sarin in the case of Vodafone for example) these are just some points that are an absolute strength and an absolute weakness in Japan's economy. Without it's rigidity Japan would never have managed to achieve the world's number two economy, they would never have managed to dominate the electronics and automotive industries as effectively as they have. And there is no doubt about it. The Japanese produce amazingly sophisticated high quality and reasonably priced goods.
However the biggest threat it is the demographic timebomb. Japan's population is aging far more rapidly than it is being replaced. Birth rates are extremely low, and have been for two decades (perhaps a symptom of the social system?) the boom population of the post war years is approaching retirement, pension costs will mushroom. Care for the elderly is already a big business in Japan (In this respect, I'm on the frontline of this at the hospital). In 2005 the number of deaths exceeded the number of births.
Now we have the same problem in the UK. The birth rate is falling rapidly and the population is aging, although not quite to the same extent. But these shortfalls are made up for by immigration. Immigration is what keeps the United Kingdom prosperous, same with the United States. I am 100% certain that the US would not be a superpower if they had not allowed so much immigration in the past, and continuing today. Likewise had the United Kingdom not allowed migrants in the 1950's and 60's the country would most likely have vanished in a black hole somewhere from chronic labour shortages. Japan's government is just, only just starting to get the message on immigration. Starting in the 1990's the Japanese government invited many people of Japanese descent in South America (chiefly Brazil) who's families had been there two or three generations, back to Japan as full fledged citizens. This is the first time ever in Japan's history that there has been an major immigration programme initiated by the government. The reasoning being that because they had Japanese ancestry they would be easily compatible with Japanese culture right?
Wrong. 10 years on the Japanese Brazilians are still here and they speak Portuguese not Japanese, all over Nishio there are Brazilian import shops opening up and doing a roaring trade on Brazilian goods. It's impossible how to say how damn strange it looks to see a foreign shop in Japan. It looks so out of place. At the nursery I work at once a week about a third of the kids are of Brazilian descent and they are really very different to the other children. They shout more, misbehave more, punch kick and bite you more, talk more etc etc. This is just a cultural difference, or perhaps in stems from them feeling marginalised in a foreign country... I don't know. But most of the staff have absolutely no idea how to manage these wilder children. Only one of the staff can speak Portuguese. Japanese child management seems to work on the basis of "you don't cooperate, you miss out, your loss..." The staff never "punish" the children if they misbehave. Now I recognise that you can't chain a three year old to a wall and flog them if they misbehave, but you can do more than just say "that's not very nice, apologise" maybe a temporary forced exclusion from activities, or taking their food away when they refuse to eat it, when they throw it on the floor, instead of refilling their bowl. In short many Japanese, unfortunately including those in power don't really seem to know how to handle immigration, or the idea of multiculturalism. I think they will get it eventually and experience they are gaining from it is invaluable in the future development of the country.
This is not a slur on the Japanese nursery system either. The staff are hardworking and diligent and love their work. The children get an absolute mass of different things to do, going for walks, treasure hunting, organised activities, dancing to songs. Someone must spend a very long time organising all of this and doing the preparations. It is overall an excellent system.
Some of the difficulties I have experienced and the people I have met say a lot about the kind of people who go travelling. Many seem to feel as if they don't fit into their home culture and that they can make up for it by living in another country, some are using it as an excuse to behave completely out of character, not everyone who volunteers or travels abroad is doing it for the right reasons. And some people I wonder why they even bothered leaving. You also meet some people who honestly must be angels on earth. There are some people here who put others absolutely before themselves, they do not seem to have a selfish bone in their body. People like this are your greatest friends when you are new in a foreign country, like me. If the world was made up of people like that, there would be no wars. I'm not even joking.
There's much more I'd love to write about but I'd better get this out or it will never be published. Hopefully I'll be able to get some pictures up soon too!
Things have changed a lot in the last few weeks, Including me physically, kind of by accident actually. I've taken to working out now more regularly, and have gone wall climbing with a Japanese friend of mine a few times. I'm trying to find the motivation to push ups in the morning too but so far not quite managed it. On top of that, instead of negotiating my way through a Japanese barber shop, a colleague at work offered to cut my hair for me, it was free so I wasn't going to complain. Unfortunately it was difficult to communicate the kind of look I wanted to achieve, so my new hair cut is a kind of weird hybrid of my former haircut and a kind of pseudo Japanese haircut look. To be honest after the placement I think I'm just going to say to hell with it, while travelling, and just let it grow, grow, grow. Same with shaving too, I'm not sure it's worth paying for razors and stuff when I'm travelling, so I'll probably just let it go a bit wild, and have something of caveman look to frighten everyone with when I return to the UK. It's not like I'm going to have to look reasonably respectable for an employer like I do at the moment anyway.
Other interesting things coming up in the next few weeks, I'm at the moment putting plans together to travel to Tokyo for New Year. This will be absolutely amazing if it all pays off. There are 3 main reasons I want to go. First off, New Year Party in the capital of Japan... what more can you ask for?! I'm hoping to be at Tokyo Tower new year street party with 10,000 other people to watch the release of a million balloons at midnight on Dec. 31st. Second January 1st is the day almost all Japanese travel to shrines all over the country to pray for good luck for the year ahead. It's an incredible atmosphere at shrines on Jan 1st, and particularly at the Meiji Shrine in Tokyo where over 1 MILLION people will pass through the shrine in one day to pay their respects. I hope to be among them. Thirdly on January 3rd Emperor Akihito will be became a public appearance at the Imperial Palace in Tokyo. This is a very big deal. The emperor is simply not accessible to the general public at all. The Imperial Family is nothing like the British Royal Family, The emperor only makes about two public appearance a year, once on his birthday, and once on January the 3rd. Other members of the royal family are even less frequently seen. No one really knows what goes on in the Imperial Household, and Japanese get uncomfortable when talking about the emperor, even today. I have noticed this the few times it has come up in conversation. It's also one of the very few times when the general public are allowed inside the Imperial Palace grounds. It's also a highly unusual event as there is very rarely any public outpouring of emotion in this country. In my opinion an unmissable opportunity. On top of all the cultural opportunities, I'm planning on travelling to Tokyo with my good Canadian friend and fellow gapper Craig, who is currently working at the Osaka district hospital. I'm also planning on travelling with Thunusha, an American English teacher I met here in Nishio City. The three of us, plus Thunusha's boyfriend, should have one hell of a week. Even better Thunusha's good friends with some semi-famous band from the US, who are in Tokyo at the moment, so we've been guaranteed some places to stay and some interesting events to go to. But as always I've got a good selection of back up plans, because some things are bound to go titsup, that's just one of the laws of travelling. I might even get a chance to return to Akihabra which would be excellent, because I didn't really get a feel for it last time unfortunately. I remember it fondly because it was one of my first experiences of Japan.
Other things that have changed in the last few weeks, I've found that I've diverged quite significantly from my gap partners out here. I rarely socialise with them now, except through work. It's unfortunate, but we've just found that there is less and less that we agree on in so many areas. Things have unfortunately degenerated into arguments a few times. Cooperation between the three of us is not essential, but it's a definite plus. There are many points of conflict, I think the attitude they take to our employers is at times a bit insulting, given our employers generosity, some of the things they get up to I consider a bit risky, considering our situation. I'm all up for having fun, in fact I will do some of the most ridiculously stupid things at times (let's just say News Streaking is on my to do list ) but being here is not like at home, and so we have to make some exceptions. I think I will go into details into some of the difficulties we face post-placement, it's not in my interest to stir up feelings now. But as a note to anyone considering gap years, make sure you can work with the people your given, and if you can't. make sure you can deal with that too! I'm not the only one who's been in difficulty either, a few of the other gappers in other parts of the country have expressed frustration at some of the attitudes of their partners. But we knew when we signed up that we would likely be paired with complete strangers and asked to cooperate for several months. It was in black and white and we knew it was coming, so for me I will just see this a test and lesson in dealing with people with completely different attitudes to you. Perhaps if I handled this better there would have not been a degeneration into arguments at times, but that should just be considered a lesson well learnt.
Cooperation and working with people is especially important here. At home is you find you don't get along with someone, you just withdraw from their company, and move onto someone else. Out here, there is no such luxury. In three months I can remember every single time I have seen someone who was not Japanese in Nishio City, that's how homogeneous this society is. If you don't get on with someone, you can withdraw from their company but that leaves you in a very difficult situation. You can't just pop into the local pub and strike up a conversation with a stranger, because it just does not work like that here. Socialising in Japan is like an ever-increasing spiral. You meet a person, who will introduce you to their friends, and if their friends like you, then they will introduce you to their friends.... etc etc. So, as a foreigner with no natural contacts you can find yourself almost completely isolated, a few fellow foreigners here in Nishio have been expressing their feelings of loneliness that they have been experiencing, it's especially bad if you do not get on well with your employer, as many many many social connections are made through work, and it's one of the few places where the "don't socialise with strangers" rules does not apply... Now all of these feeling of loneliness are amplified by a million by the language barrier too. However if you are lucky/hardworking enough to be fluent this country is your playground. You have to enterprising, motivated and a bit brave to break into Japanese social circles as a foreigner with limited Japanese but it can be done.
Despite this however most Japanese are curious, but shy of foreigners. Everyday you will see people steal glances at you, and you know that they would love to ask you questions but never will. I would say some of my best friends here are Japanese. Some Japanese (especially those learning English) will be very pleased to meet you, and will seemingly lap up every word you say (You're British? How cute! You're a University Student? How amazing!) Many will ask to have a photo taken with you, which I feel kind of weird about because it's like being claimed as a trophy, to show off to friends, but whatever. Given my personality (an attention hog at the best of times, unfortunately) it's great fun at parties when you get a lot of attention from people (especially girls)
And don't even let me get started on Japanese women. In my opinion physically they are stunningly beautiful and so cute. But of course everyone knows that relationships with people need to be built on more than looks. Many Japanese girls would be very interested in having a foreign boyfriend, sometimes for the wrong reasons as it carries a certain Kudos in some sectors. Often foreigners are considered exotic looking and beautiful. Some girls will (very cutely) go all giggly when you talk to them, some will get very touchy feely, some will be flat out uninterested. And some are "Eigo Bandits" This is a nickname for a girl who may be very flirty with you, and give signs that she's interested in a relationship, like taking you out on dates. But is really only interested in learning your English ("Eigo" is the Japanese word for English). Now I have a few female friends here in Japan who I do only meet to practice English (and Japanese) with. Such as the girls in my English Class. As long as both parties understand that, there's not much scope for things to go wrong.
Getting involved with Japanese romantically is a potentially thorny area. It's aggravated by differences in expectation in culture. Here it's considered normal to be married off by 25, and making babies by the late twenties. In fact it's not just normal, it's the expectation. Marriage is not like marriage at home, in which the predominant motivator seems to be love. Here love is a strong factor, but financial compatibility, working preferences all play a much stronger role than at home. In a way marriage can be better understood by thinking of it as a partnership pact in which both parties will benefit massively from in their work lives. I sadly see a reflection of this in some of the children at the nursery, the youngest group contains babies that are maybe 9-10 months old. Yes that's right, 10 month year old babies that are taken to a nursery EVERY DAY five days a week. That's just the way it is, Japanese people don't love their families any less than western families it's just the work ethic is incredible. Most of my Japanese colleagues start work a the same time as me but finish much later. Public affection is also a big no no. I can't remember the last time I saw a couple embracing in public. Even couples rarely hold hands. In a way it's refreshing, because there's nothing worse than being single and seeing loads of happy couples together eating each others faces off. (hmm) But I think if I was in a relationship here, it would be hard to switch off my emotional desires and needs everytime we where in public. As a foreigner your stay in Japan is very often going to be temporary. Casual relationships are less common here, but they do occur. Your temporary status is often a big off putter for Japanese girls.
Japan is a country that is either going to shoot to new heights in the new century, or fall spectacularly behind, like the United Kingdom in the middle of the 2oth Century. The primary problem with Japan's development is rigid conservatism in it's political and business machinery. The Prime Minister is almost always over 70, firms rarely recruit from outside organisations, god forbid outside countries. Sony only recently appointed it's first foreign CEO, while groups in the West have been doing it for years (Arun Sarin in the case of Vodafone for example) these are just some points that are an absolute strength and an absolute weakness in Japan's economy. Without it's rigidity Japan would never have managed to achieve the world's number two economy, they would never have managed to dominate the electronics and automotive industries as effectively as they have. And there is no doubt about it. The Japanese produce amazingly sophisticated high quality and reasonably priced goods.
However the biggest threat it is the demographic timebomb. Japan's population is aging far more rapidly than it is being replaced. Birth rates are extremely low, and have been for two decades (perhaps a symptom of the social system?) the boom population of the post war years is approaching retirement, pension costs will mushroom. Care for the elderly is already a big business in Japan (In this respect, I'm on the frontline of this at the hospital). In 2005 the number of deaths exceeded the number of births.
Now we have the same problem in the UK. The birth rate is falling rapidly and the population is aging, although not quite to the same extent. But these shortfalls are made up for by immigration. Immigration is what keeps the United Kingdom prosperous, same with the United States. I am 100% certain that the US would not be a superpower if they had not allowed so much immigration in the past, and continuing today. Likewise had the United Kingdom not allowed migrants in the 1950's and 60's the country would most likely have vanished in a black hole somewhere from chronic labour shortages. Japan's government is just, only just starting to get the message on immigration. Starting in the 1990's the Japanese government invited many people of Japanese descent in South America (chiefly Brazil) who's families had been there two or three generations, back to Japan as full fledged citizens. This is the first time ever in Japan's history that there has been an major immigration programme initiated by the government. The reasoning being that because they had Japanese ancestry they would be easily compatible with Japanese culture right?
Wrong. 10 years on the Japanese Brazilians are still here and they speak Portuguese not Japanese, all over Nishio there are Brazilian import shops opening up and doing a roaring trade on Brazilian goods. It's impossible how to say how damn strange it looks to see a foreign shop in Japan. It looks so out of place. At the nursery I work at once a week about a third of the kids are of Brazilian descent and they are really very different to the other children. They shout more, misbehave more, punch kick and bite you more, talk more etc etc. This is just a cultural difference, or perhaps in stems from them feeling marginalised in a foreign country... I don't know. But most of the staff have absolutely no idea how to manage these wilder children. Only one of the staff can speak Portuguese. Japanese child management seems to work on the basis of "you don't cooperate, you miss out, your loss..." The staff never "punish" the children if they misbehave. Now I recognise that you can't chain a three year old to a wall and flog them if they misbehave, but you can do more than just say "that's not very nice, apologise" maybe a temporary forced exclusion from activities, or taking their food away when they refuse to eat it, when they throw it on the floor, instead of refilling their bowl. In short many Japanese, unfortunately including those in power don't really seem to know how to handle immigration, or the idea of multiculturalism. I think they will get it eventually and experience they are gaining from it is invaluable in the future development of the country.
This is not a slur on the Japanese nursery system either. The staff are hardworking and diligent and love their work. The children get an absolute mass of different things to do, going for walks, treasure hunting, organised activities, dancing to songs. Someone must spend a very long time organising all of this and doing the preparations. It is overall an excellent system.
Some of the difficulties I have experienced and the people I have met say a lot about the kind of people who go travelling. Many seem to feel as if they don't fit into their home culture and that they can make up for it by living in another country, some are using it as an excuse to behave completely out of character, not everyone who volunteers or travels abroad is doing it for the right reasons. And some people I wonder why they even bothered leaving. You also meet some people who honestly must be angels on earth. There are some people here who put others absolutely before themselves, they do not seem to have a selfish bone in their body. People like this are your greatest friends when you are new in a foreign country, like me. If the world was made up of people like that, there would be no wars. I'm not even joking.
There's much more I'd love to write about but I'd better get this out or it will never be published. Hopefully I'll be able to get some pictures up soon too!
October
I've found a way to directly link videos to my blog, so it's better than having to go to youtube channel. So there you go!
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